


He Who Is Without Sin

by coldfusion9797



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, M/M, Season/Series 06
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22286158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coldfusion9797/pseuds/coldfusion9797
Summary: Hank is always there for Antonio.
Relationships: Antonio Dawson/Hank Voight
Comments: 1
Kudos: 58





	He Who Is Without Sin

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in a post-6.9 AU. I just saw this episode for the first time. (I haven't seen 6.10 yet.) Oh man, they ripped Antonio to pieces, didn't they? It was brutal and gave me a lot of feels.

Antonio walked through the front door with Hank's hand on the small of his back. They'd just come from Adam's place, a catch up with the whole team and a reaffirmation of the bond between them. 

It was hard, but Antonio knew he had to front up. He was still so ashamed by what he'd done but he owed them all, and they deserved him to have courage now, facing them was the least he could do.

Still, that didn't mean the evening hadn't taken it's toll. Every careful word and sideways glance, reminded him of exactly how bad he'd let them all down. 

Hank had handled it brilliantly, because he always did. He was a rock, not just for Antonio, but all the team. Every single one of them knew they could count on him, and at some point they'd all had reason to.

As Hank stepped inside, Antonio ran a hand down his arm and grabbed the older man's hand.

"Hank, wait."

Hank turned and looked at him the exact same way he always had. Antonio knew he was far more blessed than he deserved to be.

"Listen," he began. It was hard to say this but he had to. He had to let Hank know how much his unwavering support meant.

Hank waited patiently for him to continue, their hands still joined.

"I owe those guys, they went above and beyond for me, and I will always be grateful. But there's a reason I love you and not them."

"Oh yeah?" 

Antonio could see that love shining back at him from Hank's eyes. Even when he looked in the mirror, it was something disapproving that came back at him now, but not for one second had he ever seen that look in Hank's eyes.

"They look at me different now, I see the disappointment and the distrust, but through it all you never did. I will never be able to say how much that means. How much I needed it. How... how much I still do." His voice caught on the last part, but that was alright, Hank had seen him in much worse states than this. 

Hank squeezed his hand and stepped closer.

"We all get in over our heads. We all make mistakes. God knows, I know that as well as anyone." 

Hank was too good. The tears escaped Antonio's eyes and he closed the distance between them, dropping his head onto Hank's shoulder. Hank wrapped his arms around him. 

"I love you, baby. So much. For better or worse. I meant it. Together, we'll get through this."

"I screwed up. So bad."

"I know."

Laura had accused him of giving up his family for the job, but that wasn't true. He'd done it for Hank, let them go so he could stand by this incredible man. Even with everything that had followed, he knew it had been the right decision. What they had transcended everything, it was the only thing he couldn't imagine his life without. After he'd hurt his shoulder, Antonio had risked a lot by going down that path, but deep down he'd known this relationship with Hank wasn't one of them. He had absolute faith in Hank's love. 

"I don't deserve you."

"None of us deserve a lot of the things that happen to us," Hank said, sliding his fingers under Antonio's chin to tilt his face up. He knew he looked a mess right now, but again he knew Hank had seen him worse, so he gazed back at Hank, still finding that same unflinching look there. "But they happen anyway. Good and bad. And let me tell you Antonio, I never expected to love again after Camille, and I especially didn't expect to fall as hard as I did for you. You know what though?"

Antonio shook his head, at a loss, in awe, overwhelmed. Hank was honestly the most incredible man he'd ever known.

"I'm thankful everyday that I did. You make me better. I've found strength I didn't know I had until I met you. I can do the things I do, deal with the things I have to, because you're there."

Could it be true? Did Hank really need him as much as he needed Hank?

"Hank..."

"It's alright, Antonio," Hank said, securing an arm around his shoulders. "Come to bed. Let me hold you. I think we both need it."

Antonio sniffed and nodded. He trusted Hank to know what was right. If he'd come to Hank in the first place, none of this would have happened. It was another layer to add to his shame.

"And just so you know, Hank. I love you too. More than anything." 

Hank gave him a soft smile, and squeezed his shoulders.

"Yeah, baby. I know that too."

**Author's Note:**

> I might add a second part to this from Hank's pov. Dunno yet.


End file.
